Memento Mori, Memento Vivere: Embracing Life Fully Despite Its Fragility
In the span of just two and a half months, three individuals in my circle passed away—each of them unexpectedly and far too young. One was a dear friend’s young adult son, another was a close colleague who succumbed to illness more swiftly than anyone anticipated, and most recently, a father who suffered a fatal heart attack.
Experiencing these losses has left me reflective, somber, and deeply aware of my own mortality. In the midst of the grief and compassion I feel for their families, I’ve found myself pondering urgent questions about how I’m living my own life:
- Am I truly living fully, or am I sometimes just coasting?
- Where do I hold back—staying safe in my comfort zone—when I could be braver, bolder, and more present?
- In the midst of my own goals and dreams, am I also showing up for the people around me—heart and mind aligned?
These moments of reflection bring me back to two Latin phrases: memento mori—remember you must die—and memento vivere—remember you must live. Together, they remind us that while life is fragile and fleeting, it can also be profoundly rich and purposeful if we choose to embrace it fully.
Life Is Short: A Reality Check
None of us is guaranteed a peaceful old age, let alone the kind of graceful exit we might imagine. Life can end abruptly, just as it did for my friend’s son or my colleague. When you see how quickly things can change, the ordinary routines and worries of daily life suddenly look different: The small irritations lose their grip, and the chance to connect, to love, and to experience becomes infinitely more precious.
Key Message: Life is indeed short—sometimes painfully so. This is not meant to instill fear but rather to foster a sense of urgency and appreciation. It calls us to cut through the noise and focus on what truly matters.
These sobering realities naturally lead us to examine our own feelings and reactions, especially when confronted by sudden loss and the fragility of life.
Emotions and Reflection
Watching families and friends grapple with grief brought out my empathy, compassion, and a visceral awareness of my own limited time. I’ve been asking myself:
- Where have I been holding back?
- How can I challenge myself to be more present, more courageous, more caring?
- What does it look like to truly be “all in” with the people I love?
These questions aren’t comfortable. They illuminate the spaces where I haven’t yet stepped up—where fear, uncertainty, or the allure of staying in control can keep me from living fully. But in those same places of discomfort, there is also possibility. We grow by leaning in where it feels risky.
Moving Beyond Chasing Highs
Life isn’t just about chasing excitement or happiness. Highs and lows are inevitable, and each carries its own lessons. True contentment comes from recognizing the value in both:
- In the highs: Celebrate, savor, and share the good moments.
- In the lows: Look for what can still be appreciated—new insights, stronger connections, or deeper empathy.
If you can learn to find contentment—even amid setbacks or sorrow—you’ll discover a sense of peace that doesn’t fluctuate wildly with external events, such as the heartbreak of losing a loved one far too soon. This doesn’t mean ignoring your grief or pretending the pain isn’t there. Rather, it’s about transcending those feelings, even for moments, by shifting to a bigger perspective—one where you fully acknowledge and feel your sorrow, yet also remain aware of everything else that still exists in your life: the love and support of those around you, the simple beauties you can still appreciate, and the enduring memory of the person who passed, who would want you to continue living life to its fullest.
My Personal Commitment
In light of these realizations, I’m recommitting to:
- Show Up More Fully Giving my full presence—mind and heart—when I’m with someone, rather than drifting into the next task.
- Demonstrate More Courage Stepping forward even when it’s uncertain, asking for what I truly need, and saying “yes” to the opportunities that challenge me.
- Serve More Generously Being there for others, offering genuine support and empathy wherever I can.
- Grasp the Preciousness of Now Acting on what matters most—both the big dreams and the small acts of love—because tomorrow isn’t guaranteed.
An Invitation to You
I share these reflections not just for my own healing, but to invite you to pause and look at your own life:
- Where are you holding back? Perhaps waiting for more certainty or “the perfect time”?
- What dreams or ambitions have been on your heart that you haven’t pursued? Even if they feel scary or the path is unclear.
- Who do you want to be there for, and in what way? Your presence could be the greatest gift you offer someone else right now.
- When life feels like a low, what silver linings can you still notice? Even in sorrow, there can be something to appreciate: new insights, deeper connections, or simply the reminder that you’re still here with the capacity to love and be loved.
Let these questions be your wake-up call. Tomorrow isn’t promised. The best time to live, to love, and to make a difference is today.
Conclusion
Memento mori reminds us of life’s brevity. Memento vivere challenges us to seize the days we do have. Both remind us that life, while fragile, can be profoundly meaningful when we choose to live it courageously and with open hearts.
Whether you’re at a high point or a low point right now, may you find the clarity to see what truly matters, the courage to act on it, and the contentment that emerges from living authentically—even amid life’s inevitable uncertainties.
Remember: In the awareness of our mortality lies our invitation to truly live. Don’t wait for the “right moment.” Start now. Live your life in such a way that, even if tomorrow never comes, you will have lived, loved, and given what matters most.
If this resonates, share it with someone you love who could use this perspective. By doing so, you may spark a deeper reflection that empowers both you and those around you to embrace life more fully—lows and all.
